A couple months ago I learned something that greatly surprised me: a shocking number of writers toil away without the support of their immediate family. It was a subject of much discussion- fathers-in-law saying how easy the writer’s life is, siblings wanting to know when they were going to get ‘a real job,’ even spouses never deigning to read so much as a word by their beloved!
I was astonished. I’ve heard my fair share of jokes about how I’m living off my husband, not pulling my weight, but never from someone near and dear to me. Okay, my mom wants me to finish my master’s degree and become a social worker or a therapist, but she also thinks that all my writing is ‘brilliant.’ (That’s a doting parent for you- she even liked the one the editor called ‘dreck!’)
Never before had I realized how lucky I am to have Kevin as my life partner. He’s never been anything but supportive of my life choices, from decided to go to graduate school to deciding to quit graduate school and become a writer. He listens to my complaints when a scene isn’t coming out right and brainstorms with me when I’m stuck. He’s even promised to read every book I ever publish- though I’m not holding him to that one. (I’m afraid you have to know him to appreciate what a sacrifice that would be. Suffice it to say, cozies aren’t his preferred genre.)
I can’t say that having a supportive partner is essential to a writer’s success (particularly since I’m not successful yet), but it certainly goes a long way to making the journey more pleasant.
2 thoughts on “Why I’m Lucky (Spoiler: It’s Kevin)”
I’d never be able to write without my family having my back! (Also, they hold me accountable to deadlines.) And “dreck”? How rude. I’m quite sure it wasn’t.
Just on Monday Kevin ever-so-politely asked “So what’s your new deadline?” Normally he leaves me to my own devices, but he’d noticed that I hadn’t written anything in a few days. I suspect he was trying to gently suggest I get back to work- as a pre-author with no one officially holding me accountable, sometimes its easy to slack off.
I think my manuscript was pretty bad, actually, in a ‘first pancake’ kind of way. The new project, I hope, is far superior! But it was a blow to my ego and I haven’t even glanced at her critique since- I’m too much of a wimp. 🙂